eDrinker

As you might know I often get mistaken with another person called Oliver Coss who’s a priest and on that note I keep getting his mail. I’ve politely told them they have the wrong person but they keep emailing. So now I just reply, here are two I just got recently.

———- Forwarded message ———-
From: Oliver Jon Cross <oliver.cross@gmail.com>
Date: 2008/5/13
Subject: Re: Web Order OC64DS-1000-4415
To: XXX <XXX@fadumont.co.uk>
Hello Claire,

Thank you for the update; can you let me know if you have any satanic sensual lubrication oil in stock?

Thanks,

Oliver

2008/5/12 Claire McCabe <XXX@fadumont.co.uk>:

>
> Dear Fr Oliver Coss,
>
> Thank you for your web order OC64DS-1000-4415.
>
> The oil stock you have ordered is not in stock, delivery will take
> approximately 3 weeks for delivery, would you like me to send on what
> I can to you now ?
>
> The total cost of your order is £152. 67 including postage and packing.
>
> Please advise.
>
> Kind regards
>
> Claire
> -
> letterhead by A7Designs

———- Forwarded message ———-
From: Oliver Jon Cross <oliver.cross@gmail.com>
Date: 2008/5/13
Subject: Re: Trinity Sunday
To: Rev Adam Gaunt MA <XXX@btinternet.com>
Hello Reverend Adam,

Thank you so much for your blessings and I know everything will run to plan. At exactly 10:30 morning mass I shall sacrifice 25 goats in your name followed by cheese and crackers.

See you there,

Oliver
2008/5/12 Rev Adam Gaunt MA <XXX@btinternet.com>:

>
> Dear Father
>
> Just a short e mail to reassure you of my prayers and best wishes for
> your Ordination and First Mass.
>
> I am sorry not to be with you in person, but I will certainly remember
> you at Mass.
>
> My Ordination and First Mass were very moving occasions, as one
> chapter in life comes to a close and a whole new one opens out before
> you. I am certain your events will be equally as moving and memorable.
>
> It is also good for the people of St Mary’s to host the Ordination and
> First Mass, don’t underestimate what a power effect such services can
> have on the congregation and indeed on family and friends.
>
> Best of luck, and all that,
>
> with bles+sings,
>
> ADAM.